Caner Dreams

From gigglebyte:

"SUBJECT: ALL KINDS OF WRONG

... but also a great start to the sci-fi/horror movie 'Crack Robot Babies Go Beserk'!"

Dig the photo. Everybody remembers the Beachcombers, right? The longest running drama on Canadian television was a mind numbing mix of boring longshoreman, boring adventures and awesome wardrobe. The Beachcombers is to TV as "Rockin'" Ronnie Hawkins is to music.

The show and it's characters are ingrained in the psyche of three generations of Canadians. I don't think most of us can even remember details about it. It's just the general vibe that lingers. That "too clear" style of Canadian TV camerwork. And Relic. Everyone remembers Relic. A classic curmugeon and general Pacific Northwest scallywag. A friend in London recounts only a vague memory of the show being aired on import in England and his terror at Relic. The actor made an appearance at a city festival in Kelowna, BC and locals pelted him with stones and food saying, "Fuck You, Relic." The actor. He didn't even come in character and people hated him. So was the power of Relic's menace. His black toque (or longshoreman's cap to the unenlightened), crappy clothes and shitty attitude made quite an impression on the youth of Canada. If Santa didn't come, you could imagine a guy like Relic breaking in through your sliding glasss door and plopping a lump of coal in your stocking

Caner Dreams needed to feature a photo of Relic.

I put the challenge out to the inner circle and was astounded to get this response from the resourceful John R. John is so good he has an almost complete set of Hilarious House of Frightenstein video tapes. He COULD NOT FIND RELIC. Check it:

"His name is Robert Clothier. You can get recent pics that way. I
attached one.

A pic of him as Relic seems to be the Ultimate Canadian Internet
Challenge. I just spent 20 minutes. CBC websites, Fan sites, etc and nothing but one cast picture. You can find anything on the internet and this is not out there!

Incredible!

One crazy thing I found were News transcripts of his death

10 minutes later

Ok now I'm back on it cuz you have me hooked. I'm fucking pissed that
I can't find anything.

I just found his bio on IMDB and they say he died in 1999, the news
said 2000.

Holy shit, it's 12:38 (34 minutes spent and nothing!

I'm defeated. It is official. Relic is not on the internet!"

The photo above is of actor Robert Clothier. This is not Relic. The only picture John could find was the one at the top of this article. He's the slight, squinting man, leering behind the woman with the hat. Can anyone find a better picture of Relic? Please, someone email a picture of Relic. If you send me a good one, you'll get an exclusive Caner Dreams "Relic Hunt" mix CD.

I am drinking a TAB right now. The copyright on the can says 1993!

It's been a long time since I've come home to Caner HQ, relaxed, put on a record and spontaneously danced by myself. Kufanya Mapenzi (Making Love) by Ramsey Lewis just induced that behaviour. Please listen to this cut. It's the new Caner Dreams theme song. This song comes from the Burns Collection- a gift of a lifetime- six boxes of LPs from a co-worker who was a DJ in Philly in the late 70's/early 80's.

I wish there was an internet for food.

Please enjoy this downer version of "Kid Charlemagne"-- the first in a series of ill advised "Kid Charlemagne" covers. Just when you thought you had every sub-genre dialed.
Caner Dreams, a guaranteed badstone with every visit.